By Pat Lund June 2020

A Wedding is a joyous occasion and so stress should be kept to a minimum.  There are always people ready to offer advice and try to impose their ideas and wants on to the bride.    Although it can be frustrating and upsetting for the bride it is always important to be kind.  To a future mother in law it is a case of handing her son over to another woman  who will become all important in his life and all sorts of emotions will be experienced.  Will she love him enough, will she be loyal, etc. etc. There is always a special bond between a mother and her son and it is only when you are a mother of a son yourself that you understand.  So be gentle with her and involve her in your plans as much as you can so that she will feel part of it.  On the other hand if your future mother in law is a domineering type, you need to be firm but gentle and kind at the same time.  She will be there for the rest of your life, so start as you mean to go on.


The same applies to the bride and her mother and father.  They are handing over her precious daughter to another man and the same emotions will be felt by them.  As a mother remember that it is her special day, not yours.  So be open to discussion about the dress and reception and all that goes with it.  It is especially important to discuss the budget and try to keep within it.  Although these days many brides and grooms, including in laws, contribute to the cost of a wedding.  So it is important that everyone is kept in the loop.

Siblings also need to feel part of the plans and may be included in the retinue or have some other important part to play, such as MC.  There may be nephews and nieces that you want to include or not.  Remember it is your day but it will be all the more joyous is everyone compromises and works together to make it a truly great day.